I didn’t find my story particularly interesting until having spoken it aloud.
This man is a pianist with the Washington National Opera. He discusses how music as an outlet, open relationships, and how his experiences when he was young shaped who he is today. At first he did not think his story was particularly interesting, but he quickly learned that he does have a relatable story to share...just as we all do. This story was captured in Washington, D.C. Read and listen to learn more!
My boyfriend and I are both musicians.
We both work in opera. One of the conditions of our relationship is that we won’t be in the same place for the majority of the time. We are not with other people when we are together, but we do see other people when we are apart.
We spent a year being monogamous.
It was difficult, but we were both committed and did it successfully. We had a casual conversation before we moved in together where he shared that he would't be upset if I wanted to be with other people.
We established the terms that could be with other people while remaining in a relationship with each other.
The agreement was if one of us becomes uncomfortable with what the other person is doing, then the open part of the relationship is called off. We would then go back to being monogamous. You’re supposed to set up rules for open relationships. If I can go back and do things over I would set even more rules. For example, we both allow ourselves to share our stories with one another, but we never came to an agreement around how often we'd share those stories.
I was gay ever since I was growing a eyeball in the womb.
I went to an Orthodox Hebrew School in LA. There was a pressure to be a lot more masculine than I was at the time. There was a sense of machismo that I did not relate to, and I felt I didn't fit in since all the boys my age were being super macho. I was studying piano back then, but the arts were not a part of my schooling. I was sort of stifled that way in school. I didn’t have anything that I could identify with. I didn’t have anything in common with any of the other boys my age.
MySpace was how I dabbled in flirting.
That is how I met my first boyfriend who was also a musician from LA. We met online when I was 15 while I was attending a performing arts public High School in LA. There were a lot of gay kids, so that is when I came out to my parents. I even went to prom with my boyfriend.
There is something biological about being a gay person.
Why are there so many gay people in the arts? How can you correlate something so abstract as being artistic? I don’t know why I don't think of being a musician as being an outlet. That has to be what it is. I’ve been doing it for so long. It is a shame i don’t think of it as being an outlet. I hope that is what it is…it makes it much less exciting if it is not.